Macy Is Illin', or How I Spent My Saturday

1. Wake up earlier than usual (around 8:30) because I know I have to stop by Mom's this morning. Looking forward to something tasty for breakfast because I'm already a little hungry after last night's sub-stellar bowling event.


2. Read a little of The Lost Symbol until snoring husband flips over to face me. Stare at snoring husband until he opens his eyes a little. Engage him in conversation enough to wake him up. Inwardly snicker a bit at my diabolical success.

3. Shake head in disbelief when husband proclaims "we" woke up too early to have breakfast. "It throws off the whole day," he says. Um, OK. It's now two hours until his designated lunch time. I will try to make it.

4. Load large ladder into not-quite-big-enough car and drive to Mom's to replace air filter. Who builds a house so you need a ladder to change the air filter? And what idiot doesn't notice that when looking for a house for Mom to live in? Oh yeah, that's me.

5. Go to fat-girl store, looking for something formal for the Gov's Banquet. Didn't find anything, but they have something at the store in Cedar Hill, which is only about two hours from here.

6. Try fat-girl sections in major department stores. FOUND SOMETHING, and cannot believe the luck. Not only does it fit, but it was a return and so is drastically marked down. Not sure all parts of the suit will work, but the jacket could be worn with the pant/skirt that I already have. Score.

7. Am finally cleared for nourishment. Choose Mexican food, because I am so freakin' starving at this point. Was able to contain my eyes-bigger-than-stomach syndrome. Food was gooooooood. Drink was even better. Mint at the end was fabulous.

8. Drove around. Went up to Allen and checked out their new little apartment/shopping community. Would totally have loved living there if I was a 20-something. Really nice. Really cool. Really largly undiscovered by the public so far, which is good. Probably will be crawling with peeps around Christmas.

9. Side trip to Stonebriar. To my happy surprise, it was still free gift time at Clinique. I needed cleanser. Got it. Got freebie. Very happy.

10. Came home. It's 3 p.m. Hubby going to play cards in 45 minutes. Opened door to smell of poop. Bad poop. Slimy gift on kitchen floor. Larger, more sold gift on living room carpet (which is just going to have to be replaced anyway). Smore stealthy gifts in "throw-up" areas of kitchen. Spots of blood. I lose it. Call vet. Vet says dog probably ate something bad. (Duh.) Says bring dog in if no improvement.

11. Clean up vom. Vom myself in kitchen sink. Scott cleans up vom. Voms himself outside. Nice.

12. Macy outside, uncharacteristically NOT eating grass. Must be near death, I think. Macy comes back inside. Voms again, beginning the whole cycle over. Two rolls of paper towels later, Macy is in living room resting. Mommy blogs. Daddy leaves for card-playing. Momy leaves back door open for Macy (gotta get a doggie door).

13. Eat, Pray, Love comes on Starz. Perhaps I can watch without vom. Macy sleeps. My poor puppy.