No. Well, not really. But December 26, 2011, was the last day of lying to myself. It was the last day of telling myself that what I put into my mouth didn't make a difference. It was the last day of rationalizing my behavior, good and bad, and using that rationalization to my own benefit.
The way I was going was leading to an early grave and an obituary I wasn't going to be particularly proud of. Sure, St. Peter will let me in the Pearly Gates regardless (I'm sure a future post will cover this topic.), but when I stand before my Maker, what will I tell Him I have done to glorify Him by using the gifts He has so generously given me? And really, I long to see Daddy and Granddaddy and Gigi and my other relatives and friends who've gone before me, but I think I can wait a few decades when all of eternity is my reward.
So, instead of continuing to kill myself daily with a horrible diet and a stressful, sedentary lifestyle, I am making changes. No need to wait for New Year's Day. What difference is five days going to make? I started by writing my own obituary (something I have wanted to do, and have been scared to do, since I saw Serendipity). This obit reflects the difference that will be made between the old me and the new me. The new me has a renewed outlook on life and a renewed sense of potential. I can do all those things: I can write children's books that help increase their self-esteem and awareness of how nutrition and exercise really is important. I can get my financial affairs in order so I can retire and live the rest of my days on a ranch in Colorado where every stray animal can find a forever home if no one else wants it. And I can raise kids who will love me for who I am, even if I'm not really their mother.
Who knows if that's really the path I will follow. Those are just a few dreams I am dreaming on this, the first day of the rest of my life.
No comments:
Post a Comment