Sunday, December 26, 2010

Did She Really Croak?

No. Well, not really. But December 26, 2011, was the last day of lying to myself. It was the last day of telling myself that what I put into my mouth didn't make a difference. It was the last day of rationalizing my behavior, good and bad, and using that rationalization to my own benefit.



The way I was going was leading to an early grave and an obituary I wasn't going to be particularly proud of. Sure, St. Peter will let me in the Pearly Gates regardless (I'm sure a future post will cover this topic.), but when I stand before my Maker, what will I tell Him I have done to glorify Him by using the gifts He has so generously given me? And really, I long to see Daddy and Granddaddy and Gigi and my other relatives and friends who've gone before me, but I think I can wait a few decades when all of eternity is my reward.



So, instead of continuing to kill myself daily with a horrible diet and a stressful, sedentary lifestyle, I am making changes. No need to wait for New Year's Day. What difference is five days going to make? I started by writing my own obituary (something I have wanted to do, and have been scared to do, since I saw Serendipity). This obit reflects the difference that will be made between the old me and the new me. The new me has a renewed outlook on life and a renewed sense of potential. I can do all those things: I can write children's books that help increase their self-esteem and awareness of how nutrition and exercise really is important. I can get my financial affairs in order so I can retire and live the rest of my days on a ranch in Colorado where every stray animal can find a forever home if no one else wants it. And I can raise kids who will love me for who I am, even if I'm not really their mother.



Who knows if that's really the path I will follow. Those are just a few dreams I am dreaming on this, the first day of the rest of my life.

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